On decluttering, and why the attic is the nemesis of the minimalist

I’m back on the decluttering train. My last Big Throw Away started about 4yrs ago, when we lived in London (in a much bigger house than our current one). I followed the KonMari system, starting with clothes, then moving on to books, papers and all the other general “stuff” in the house. I did’t log what I got rid of, but it must have been hundreds of items (if not more).

Up until that point, I had been a bit of a hoarder. I come from a family of hoarders – my dad collects EVERYTHING: antiquarian books, paperwork, clocks, glassware, antiques… you could say it’s in my genes… As an example, my parents once gave my their old filing cabinet, so I filled it with papers, old bills, payslips, receipts, documents, my daughter’s artwork. My hoarding expanded to fill the space available.

I had kept ALL of my daughter’s old clothes up to that point (and she was 9yrs old when I started decluttering), you know, just in case…Then I had my second child and when it was a boy I realised I probably was going to have to get rid of all of this stuff. In the attic there were enormous bin bags upon bin bags FULL of sleepsuits, toddler clothes, baby toys…I had to admit I had forgotten exactly what was in there (out of sight, out of mind). I always thought I’d either use it for some future child, or I’d get around to selling it.

Once I got started, there were clothes EVERYWHERE. I gave lots away to friends with daughters, the charity shops, and even managed to put a few special items on Ebay. I soon began to feel much lighter, that all of this stuff had been weighing us down.

I got rid of many of my own clothes, realising that I had a lot of stuff I was keeping in case I got invited to a ‘special occasion’ (I rarely did, and even then, you only need one outfit to wear, right?). It began to feel really therapeutic, this getting rid of Stuff. And so I went on, letting go of all of these items that were no longer needed.

And whilst we no longer have Stuff on such a grand scale, there is still work to be done. I’ve been reading and listening to lots of podcasts on minimalism, and whilst I am far from that ideal, I still feel weighed down by having clutter lying around. So I have decided to do The 30-Day Minimalist Game (“minsgame” to its friends) in June. If you’re not familiar with it, the idea goes like this: on day 1, you get rid of one item (give away, sell, take to the charity shop). On day 2, you do two items, and so on and so on until day 30 when you get rid of 30 items. This gives a grand total of 496 items in one month. Anything goes – papers, books, toys, DVDs, kitchenware, whatever you like.

We no longer have an attic, so I know there is not a whole Secret Room Full Of Stuff to be eliminated, but my 5yr old has outgrown lots of games and toys recently, and this seems like a good opportunity to have a clear out. I’ll be logging my progress on Instagram, and will post my progress and results here…Here goes!

Some of the links in this post are affiliate links. This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission at no extra cost to you. All opinions remain my own.

What exactly is slow and simple living?

We hear these terms “slow living” and “simple living”, but what exactly do they mean?

The idea of slow living began with food, and was sparked as a reaction against the fast food industry, preferring instead eating seasonally, organically produced traditional meals. This spread from a love for slow food (home-cooked from scratch, with love and attention) to all areas of life, and featured in Carl Honore’s book In Praise of Slow, the first place where the term “Slow Movement” was coined. This doesn’t mean we do everything at a snail’s pace, but rather we bring intentionality to our actions, preferring quality over speed. Carl is also passionate about the role of community in slow living, getting to know the person who works at the farmer’s market selling you your seasonal veg, knowing your neighbours, etc.

This has spread out to all areas of life, from parenting to fashion, from travel to how we manage our money. People are reacting against the fast pace of modern life, and choosing to slow down and value what they have, rather than mindlessly consuming. More and more people are choosing to live life at a different pace, enjoying the quality of their experiences, rather than passively going from one thing to the next on life’s treadmill, feeling that we have to keep up with the Joneses.

Slow fashion is a reaction against the ugly world of fast high-street fashion, which relies on sweatshops and unethical practices and a throw-away attitude to “out of fashion” clothing. Slow fashion might mean making your own clothes from scratch, or choosing to buy from an ethical producer, one who considers the environment in their manufacturing methods, giving a fair deal to the producers and buyers alike. It might mean having a capsule wardrobe, of your own style, rather than keeping up with seasonal fashion trends.

Related to slow living is simple living, which means choosing to live with less. This often takes the form of minimalism, not hoarding tons of unnecessary stuff, decluttering and only having what you really need. Minimalism does not necessarily mean you live in an empty home, but that you only have what you truly need and actually use. Marie Kondo (author of The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up) says we should keep only what sparks joy, and has a systematic plan for decluttering every area of your home.

Again, this can extend to all areas of life, from technology (clearing your inbox each day, going TV-free), your work-life balance and how much time you choose to spend at work, downsizing your home and becoming more environmentally aware. The whole zero-waste movement is a massive step towards simple living in terms of leaving a lighter footprint upon the earth through reducing food waste and plastic packaging, or choosing to make your own beauty or kitchen cleaning products.

The main thing to take away is that there is no “one size fits all” way of slowing down and simplifying your life, it looks different for different people. Someone with children will have more stuff in their home than someone without kids, that’s a fact. One person may love the look of an almost-empty room, whereas someone else may have some carefully chosen and much-loved artwork and ornaments around. I personally don’t go for many ornaments around the home, as it’s just another thing to dust! Rather than letting slow and simple living become another form of keeping up with the Joneses, how could you bring more intentionality and quality to your everyday life?

Some of the links in this post are affiliate links. This means if you click on the link and purchase the item, I will receive an affiliate commission at no extra cost to you. All opinions remain my own.

My journey towards slow and simple living

I’ve never really been one for keeping up with the Joneses, never really felt the need to have the latest tech device or strictly follow fashion, never been one of those folks who has to have a holiday abroad every year. Having my first child 13yrs ago opened my eyes to the potential of a slower lifestyle – with a new baby (and even in pregnancy) you really have to slow down. I enjoyed this new pace of life, and cut my hours at work to the minimum I could afford to work.

However, with having children comes a great accumulation of STUFF – clothes and toys, and I found myself hanging on to things “just in case” I ever needed them for a future child. Once I ran out of space in my small flat, I began to store things in my parents’ loft (out of sight, out of mind).

It wasn’t until several years later that I discovered meditation, through a tutor on a counselling skills course I was doing. I began to develop the ability to create mental space, life-changing skills in mindfulness and self-awareness. Creating space allowed me to notice the little things, to appreciate more. This was definitely the key for me in slowing down.

We had moved into a “nice” house in the London suburbs, because that’s what you do, right? However, we never really felt like we fitted in there, spending much of our time in much hipper areas further into the city.

After my second child was born, I was determined that I didn’t want to return to work. I had always had home education on my radar, but never felt in a position to do it. But now I was going to be at home, we could give it a go. At first, we went on all of the educational trips I could find, but after a while we settled into our own rhythm, with a much gentler pace.

After a couple of years, my husband began to get ill with what later turned out to be an auto-immune disease. We began to reevaluate our lives, to think about what really mattered. We knew we weren’t happy in our current state, and began to make plans.

After much deliberation, we decided to take the plunge and sell our spacious semi-detached surburban house and downsize to a terraced house in central Brighton. On paper, it was “risky” – we didn’t know Brighton that well, had lots of friends in London. Some people thought we were bonkers moving into a smaller house with 2 children, but to be honest we had rooms in our bigger house that we weren’t even using.

During the moving process, I discovered Marie Kondo‘s book: The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up. I began to declutter, and it felt really cathartic getting rid of all of this stuff I’d been keeping from the past. So many kids’ clothes and papers! We had to get rid of most of our furniture as well, as it just wouldn’t have fitted in the smaller house.

Two years later, we are loving our new life by the sea. My husband took a part-time job, which was lower paid, but which allows him to be more hands-on with the home education, which he really enjoys. So many Dads of home ed families are working long hours to support that lifestyle, but are unable to be very involved. Working part-time has allowed him to reduce his stress levels, which has had a positive impact on his health.

Our most recent addition to our slow and simple journey is reducing waste, particularly plastic. This is very much a work in progress, as is this whole journey. What small step could you make today to slow down and simplify?